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Yesterday I went to fiddle around between work and the gym just to clear my mind from the day's stress. I went into Cato's. I was shocked and amazed that for the first time in years, I was able to go to the right - to the regular sizes, instead of to the left - to the plus sizes.
I can't get used to having to try on everything. When I was was bigger, I NEVER tried on anything b/c it wasn't going to look good either way. Most things just fit in a tent-like fashion anyway. I was actually able to buy one shirt in a size LARGE!!! I haven't bought a large shirt since I got married!
Pants were another story. Women's pants are crazy these days. You have the regular rise, the low rise, and the ultra low rise. Well, because of my nasty tummy, I am still stuck in the 14-16 size if I try on a regular rise. If I wear something that goes below my gut, I can go down to a 12-14 range. It is such a problem for me b/c pants are constantly falling down in the back. I don't want to get the waist too tight b/c then I'll cause a bigger roll to form in the front! It is very tricky business! That's OK, at least I'm not having to go UP in size to get things to fit... and one day I'll have a nice (surgically created) flat stomach that I can be proud of! LOL
I am so pooped today! I take Groove on Tuesday nights. That class whips my booty! By the time I get to bed, my ankles, knees, and shins are throbbing. Groove is also the only class that makes my asthma act up. Lots of people tell me that Groove doesn't work them that hard - all I have to say is, those people MUST be doing something wrong! I take every group fitness class at DD, except Step, and if you do it "full out" it is MAJOR!! The cool thing is, Groove is the most fun class that I take all week! I absolutely love it!! The bad thing is that I am always so tired on Wednesdays I have to drag myself out of bed to make it to the gym. This morning my knee was aching. I thought - NO, I don't think so. I am not going to start having "injuries" at the END of the contest. So, I just ignored it and kept on excercising...sure hope I don't regret that! ha ha.
I guess I'll save all my sappy, end of the contest stuff for Friday. That will be my last blog since I don't have internet at home - yes, I realize I need to join the 21st century and get internet at home. I guess it is natural to start reflecting on things when you know they are coming to an end. I have done a lot of that lately. I assume Lee has too from the looks of her last blog - LOL. So, until then...
Well, only one more full week to go! It is hard to believe that 11 weeks has gone by so quickly. During these 11 weeks I have really learned a lot and I have started to feel like 'one of the gang' at DD. When I first started taking classes I felt like I stuck out because I was one of the only people in there that was gasping for air!
Going into the group fitness classes can be so intimidating for someone my size. It feels like everyone there is skinny and in great shape. I got so much encouragement from everyone there to stick with it. They told me it would get easier and it has - except for Centergy, they need to just call that class HELL ON EARTH.
About 1/2 way through that hour of torture, I begin to ask myself, "why did I come to this class again?" But by the end I've talked myself into coming back again so that I can get strong enough to do the entire hour.
One of the things that kept me going was an instructor, Karen. Early on in the competition, Karen called me to the front after class to show me pictures of herself that were taken about two years ago. She was bigger than me. To look at her now, you would never know it.
It made me realize that not everyone in my classes were life-long skinny people! Some of them have had to fight the same fight as me.
Many people have asked me (lately) "who is winning?" I explain to them that Lee is winning and most likely will win the entire contest b/c she is currently at 14% lost and I am in 2nd place with 9% lost. Statistically it is almost impossible for me to win - unless she gains weight and I stop eating all together - LOL. The reactions that I get are always the same: "are you sure?", "you can still win", "don't say that". I find this so funny b/c I am so NOT concerned about winning.
Don't get me wrong, I would love to go to Mexico, but I am no longer doing this for the contest. Excercising is such a huge part of my life now! So many times I am asked "how do you keep up with everything plus working out twice a day?" The answer is: it just becomes part of your routine. For example, I did not work out this morning for the first time in several weeks (had a massive headache!). I feel like I forgot to get dressed or something. My body is so confused! LOL
I feel so lucky that I was almost "forced" into this lifestyle. I probably would never have become a "gym rat" without the Biggest Loser competition. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you to KPLC and DD for helping me feel human again (as opposed to a big blob).
I HAVE NEWS!!! This event actually took place Tuesday night, but I was so dumbfounded I had to process it yesterday before I could put it in my blog. I took Groove on Tuesday night with Keyon - which by the way is the most fun class EVER!!!! After class Keyon called me and one other girl to the front. She asked us if we would be interested in training to TEACH Groove!!!!!! I was so touched, overwhelmed, flattered...b/c she asked ME. This may not have been that big of a deal to physically fit person, but it was a huge deal to someone that could barely tie her shoes a couple of months ago! I told Keyon I was not really ready to be in front of people yet - I could just see all these ladies coming into Groove class and thinking "oh yeah, this fat chick is really going to be able to teach me something!" But, she said that I could train and then start teaching when I am ready.
I know I say this all the time, but I look at myself everyday so I really don't notice that big of a change in my body. I have to constantly remind myself where I started from. When Keyon asked me to teach, that was such a huge reminder for me (I need those kind of reminders periodically!) Another thing that helped me to note my progress was Power class this morning (yes, 5:15 AM! whew that's early). When I first started taking Power I was using the smallest weights on my bar for a massive total of 2 lbs. I have stepped it up a couple of times. For my leg tracks on Saturday I will be using a total of 10 lbs and 9 lbs on upper body. If I went back to 2 lbs I would be throwing that bar in the air! LOL
I still think the hardest thing about this program is the food. Not that I eat bad (especially compared to the toxic waste I used to eat), but I am a snacker and I don't like to cook. I am all about convience. My husband works about 3 nights a week, so it is much easier to pick up something for my son and I than it is to cook.
My lifestyle really doesn't lend itself to eating all natural foods - working out before work, teaching MIDDLE SCHOOL, working out after work, being Mom, etc, etc, etc, etc. But, I am trying. Every day I think that I ate too much, but then I look back at my food journal and I really didn't. Every day is a challenge, especially when I'm tired - I could easily just go get a hamburger or a pizza and move on down the road!!
Well, we weighed in for the 2nd to last time yesterday. It was kind of funny b/c everyone that KNOWS me thought I would be upset b/c I did not win...again. However, I was not the least bit concerned about not winning - at least I lost weight this month. Is it going slow? Yes. But, I know that the inches are definately decreasing. On Saturday I hit two milestones - I bought a pair of size large shorts (yes I said large, notice no "X" in the front of that) and I bought three shirts from the JUNIOR department. The shirts were an XL, but when I first started this competition I was wearing a ladies' 2XL or a plus sized 1XL. The thought of being able to go all over the store to look at a variety of clothes was a huge deal for me!! I honestly can not remember the last time a bought a pair of size large shorts... maybe 1999 or 2000. I am not weighing the same on the scale as I did in '99 or 2000, but my sizes are about the same. That just proves to me that I have more muscle now than I did then. I guess it is true what they say, muscle really does weigh more than fat.
Yesterday we found out that we get to go to Henrietta's in Sulphur on the last day of the competition! We were sooooooo excited! We get to chose three services before our actual TV appearance, so don't be shocked when we are looking all glamorous - LOL. We also get to wear regular clothes. I was so excited to have a good excuse to go shopping - ha ha! By the way, the final weigh in will not be until the 6 PM news on March 3rd. Kind of feels like the "big time", making it to the evening news - LOL!!
The other day my mother told me that the more weight I lose the shorter I look. I thought that was pretty funny. Yesterday as I met with my "loser buddies" on Sunrise I started to notice that they all look shorter too - especially Lee. Lee has lost sooooo much weight that she is starting to appear to shrink - LOL. I honestly thought that she was taller than me and then yesterday I noticed that she is actually shorter than me! Isn't that funny? So I guess the moral of the story is if you want to appear tall, don't lose too much weight - ha ha!!!!
Just as a little note to those of you following this competition closely... I have a mini goal for the final weigh in. I REALLY want to have a "1" as the first number of my weight by the end of this, even if it is 199 lbs. So, cross your fingers and wish me luck!!!
Like most large people I typically hide from any camera in site. Some "lucky" people do have a few stolen shots of me over the past couple of years - namely my husband who is a picture taking freak! Luckily he forced me in front of the camera last year at our Mardi Gras ball. We were downloading the pics from this year's ball and we stumbled across last year's pics. I was pleasantly surprised with the comparison. My face last year was MUCH fuller than this year. I think b/c you see yourself all the time it is hard to tell the changes taking place with your body. Let me just say, I am NOT happy with myself yet, but at least it gave me a little boost to keep going with my diet and excercise. I constantly have to remind myself "baby steps, baby steps, baby steps". Baby steps are hard for me - I am a black or white kind of person - not into the gray thing. I like instant results! ha ha.
We rode in the parade last night. I caught myself throwing beads to all the heavy ladies. I don't mean that in a cruel way, I just felt a bond with them! Before I started this journey I didn't really think much about my health or appearance. It is almost like I didn't really realize that I felt bad or that I struggled to do things (tying my shoes, getting up and down off the floor, etc). I didn't realize it until I started to notice all of the improvements. One day I dropped something on the passenger side floor of my car while sitting in the driver's seat. I reached over the stick shift and deep into the opposite floor board, grabbed the object, popped up and thought "I can't believe I just reached that!" So, for all of you out there that think diet and excercise won't help your situation, just try it and you'll see that everyday tasks become easier and easier. Don't know about you, but anything that helps to simplify my life is a true blessing!
Well, I've noticed that I definately blog more than the other three ladies - that's what happens when you give someone like me to freedom to put in my "two cents" whenever I want! If I didn't love to talk, I wouldn't be a teacher! I am really beginning to wonder if my top half is ever going to start shrinking! Yesterday, as I waddled and rolled through Centergy I noticed myself in the mirror (which by the way is a cruel joke by DD to put full length mirrors in the fitness room). I really think I look a whole lot like a basketball with a head and four sticks poking out of it. My legs and arms are starting to have an actual shape, but the rest of my body is still very ball-like. I don't get it, why does it seem like it takes forever for some parts to shape up? According to my tape measure I have lost several inches from my waist, hips, and shoulders but it must all be shrinking proportionally. So I guess maybe I went from looking like a beach ball to a basket ball! It is just irritating that I let myself get into this situation and that is seems to be the slowest process in the world to un-do! Funny how that works - I know if I wanted to gain back all my weight I could accomplish that in about 2 weeks but God forbid I lose it that quickly - LOL! I guess I need to try to remember that old saying "a watched pot never boils" (considering I examine myself daily in those lovely mirrors!).
Just a note... my trainer, David, has decided to leave DD. I did not ask for details, I figured that was his private business. I do want to take this opportunity to thank him so much for all of his hard work and patience with me over the past 6 weeks. Thank you, David, for helping me change my life! Good luck to you!
Well, this is probably not the best day to blog b/c I am not in the best frame of mind. I decided that maybe ya'll may need to see that this program really does have its ups and DOWNS!! LOL I am totally exhausted this week. I don't know what is wrong with me! On my way to work today I had to shake my head around and sing out loud to stay awake. Isn't exercise supposed to make you have energy? Well, it usually does - but not this week. I don't know if it is something that I am eating or not eating correctly OR if I am trying to still get over my last illness??? I have been working out like normal so that's not it (no change there). I just don't know. Then on top of being pooped, I had one of those mornings that you just want to turn around and go back to the bed. In about 10 minutes time, my child's glasses broke (and I couldn't find the super glue) and my garage door decided to be possessed! I was just about ready to scream. Oh, and I forgot to add this other little "lovely". While feeling like crap I also have an added bloated stomach. I don't know what the problem is, but I look like I'm about 4 months pregnant. Therefore, the pants I had on originally this morning were squishing me so I said "forget it!" I yanked off my pants and put on my jeans. It's not casual Friday - but OH WELL!!! Lordy, someone please send me home!!
Well, I am breathing a sigh of relief today b/c I didn't lose any weight, but I didn't GAIN any either! Yes, I realize this is a different attitude than I 've had in the past, but the bottom line is that "life" is going to get in the way of weight loss now and then. After all, we are not secluded to a fat ranch - LOL! I have come to realize that this contest is kind of a "secondary" thing for me. Losing weight and getting in shape is my main goal but it is such a long term goal, the contest is kind of becoming lagnaippe! I know that I have WAY more than 11 weeks worth of weight to lose. Now, let me clarify - I'll take the cruise - but it is not my main concern!
I had a couple of "bitter sweet" moments this weekend. My sister and I went to try on dresses for the ball I am attending on Friday. I had much more to chose from, however I am no where near the size I WANT to be in. I think that this smack of reality was good for me. Because this program is so public I constantly have people telling me that "I look sooo good". I think the proper statement should be "you look so much better"! Don't get me wrong, I really really appreciate the support and compliments, but it had started to give me a little too much confidence. 206 pounds is NOT where I want to be- by any stretch of the immagination. I agree that I look much better, but I also need to keep in mind that I still have a long way to go.
I also cleaned out my closet this weekend. I got rid of two yard sized trash bags full of clothes. It was exciting but kind of a shame at the same time. I had several really nice/newer things that I had purchased for work this school year, that I can now pull off without unbuttoning - BUT they are still in really good shape (since they have only been worn for 4 or 5 months). It almost feels like a waste of money. You know, I'm a school teacher so I am ALWAYS worried about money (since we make that massive salary - ha!). The good news is that I uncovered several items I was saving, hoping to get back into one day. Oh, come on girls, you know you have a stash too! It has been so long since I attempted to put on some of these items that some of them are almost too big - guess I waited a little long to try them! I swear, if I could lose some of my gut I could go down 2 more sizes! For some reason my belly wants to hang on to all of its inches. On the other hand, my butt and hips are shrinking like crazy so my pants are all saggy in the rear but hanging on to the "roll" in the front! That's what happens to most mommies - those lovely stretch marks haunt us for life! Every time I examine my tummy I think of the TV show "Jon and Kate plus 8". This woman had sextuplets and twins. Afterward, her stomach looked like a bull dog's face. I am starting to have that same picture - you know, the belly button is where the dog's nose would be - kind of holding up the middle - and then all around it is the saggy, floppy parts - LOL!! Such a lovely image! I constantly remind my self of the baby steps - at least now my chest sticks out further than my stomach does!!
Well, I will be doing good to have lost any weight this week! I just can't seem to shake this upper respiratory infection. I feel better, but I still cough my head off if I move around too much or get too hot. I am sure my trainer probably thinks I fell off the face of the earth. Oh well, it is fun to torment him a little - LOL. I did go do some cardio for about 45 minutes yesterday afternoon. I had to take a nap before I even attempted it, but the point is, I did it. I was so out of breath it felt like I had just started this competition. I'll be glad when my chest is all cleared up and I can go back to doing what I want to do. It is funny, when I first started this competition I didn't even realize how limited I was physically. Now that I am sick, it is almost like "re-living" my prior state. Let me tell you, I don't miss it. However I do miss being at the gym twice a day and I actually miss my 5:00 AM workouts. Hopefully I will be able to stop hacking up a lung pretty soon so I can get rid of the "no excercise guilt". I also NEED my "me time" (I'm spoiled to having it now). I truly believe that one of the main causes of weight gain in women is that they don't take enough time for themselves. So, I'm gonna preach it to ya "sisters"! You CAN take time for yourself, you NEED to take time for yourself, and there ARE enough hours in the day. I promise you will thank yourself later! I spent way too many years allowing myself excuse after excuse. Now my main regret is that I waited so long to "fit" excercise into my life. OK, I'm now stepping off my soap box... until next time!
Well I hit the 20 pound mark! Only 50 more to go - HA! I am happy with that. Kind of that slow but steady pace going on. I am in a Mardi Gras Krewe (Krewe de L'Amitie - shout out!) and we had our ball this past Friday. As I walked around and chatted with people before it got started I almost teared up as I realized I was not the biggest woman at the ball this year! Was I ever the biggest? Probably not, but it sure seemed that way to me. I did not realize how low my self-esteem had become in the last several years. I know I have a long way to go to reach my goal, but I am starting to feel better "inside" and that is a very big deal! I could NOT get over the constant compliments from my fellow krewe members. Several people told me that I HAD to blog every day b/c I "inspired" them or at least gave them a good laugh for the day! I ran into a couple of old high school friends that night as well and amazingly I was not ashamed to stop and visit! I had such a blast and I didn't even have to depend on any "liquid confidence" ha ha ha! I would like to thank everyone for their kind words and all the encouragement I receive day after day. It really does make a difference in this adventure.
Saturday, Sunday, and Monday I did not get to exercise b/c I was sick as a dog! I have the worst chest congetstion, not to mention my head feels like it is about to explode! Here is the scary thing - my goal for the day is to call my doctor so that I can feel better and get back to Dynamic! Don't get me wrong, I love having a reason for my husband to cater to me, but my excercise is more important. Many of you may think that this has to be an overdose of sinus medicine talking, but I promise, it is really me - LOL!! NEVER in my wildest imagination would I have believed that I would be dying to get back to the gym!!! But, I feel so much better than I have in a really long time!
Some time next week I have to go shopping for another formal dress b/c my husband and I were invited to another Mardi Gras ball this year. Typically my sister would have to drag me by my hair kicking and screaming and force me to try on dresses. This time I am actually looking forward to it - not that I am going to look "hot", but at least I won't leave the dressing room ready to vomit!!! I'll be sure to keep everyone updated on the dress shopping - heaven knows I'll have plenty to say after I actually try some on!
Well, my trainer David deserted me for the next week and a half to go visit his brother in South America - guess I'll let him slide - ha! Never fear, he set me up with substitute trainers along the way. I worked with Christine Friday and Daron today. I'm here to tell you they are all insane! LOL! My rear end feels like it is going to cramp up at any minute. That might be an interesting sight in front of 25 eighth graders??? Yesterday as I did step class I realized that I was actually enjoying working out and that I really had come a long way. When I first started I would check my heart rate as I worked on the elliptical. At that time my heart rate would be up to 160 bpm in no time. Now I have to be on there at least 12-15 minutes before it will even reach 150! I am even starting to feel my age (33) instead of 93 years old. There were times in the last couple of years that my mother (who's age I won't reveal for fear of being disowned) seemed to have more energy than me! I am proud to say that I'm pretty sure she wouldn't be able to keep up with me now (which is the way it is supposed to be - ha ha).
I also want to thank everyone for all of your words of encouragement. After my blog on 1/14 I had tons of people contact me to give me many kind words and remind me (over and over) not to give up. I know that I would not have made it through the past 4 1/2 weeks without constant support from friends, family and even a few kind strangers. Because of all this, I have decided to set a new long term goal - to one day be the person that can encourage and train others to change their lives as well.
1/14/08 Part Two:
Well, yes I realize that this is my 2nd blog in one day, but I have relaxed and gotten my mind straight. I was so aggravated with my body this morning I could have quit. However, I spoke to many people during the morning (like Robert at DD and Kelly L.) that made me realize that these plateaus are going to occur.
I started looking at my food journal from last week which made me realize part of the problem. There was one or two days when I only ate about 800-900 calories and most of the other days I didn't reach 1200. I have the theory now that my body must have been in that "survival/starvation mode" b/c I wasn't getting enough calories.
Here is the dumb part, David told me earlier this week that I wasn't always getting enough calories or protein in my diet and I didn't believe him!!!! I think that I had a mental block b/c NO ONE has EVER told me that I wasn't eating enough calories!! This is a whole new ball game for me. Talk about un chartered territory - I'm having to watch what I eat b/c I'm not eating enough??? What the heck?
Anyway, now that I've given myself a good pep talk and received pep talks from several other people, I am ready to start back up and kick some booty!! LOL Congratulations to Lee - was so busy being mad at myself I forgot to congratulate you on your wonderful accomplishment!
Well, I am writing this blog shortly after our weigh in this morning. I was VERY upset with my one pound loss today. I felt like all of my work, starvation, and time away from my family had been wasted. I know that is the wrong attitude, but I can't help it. All of this time spent alone (not as mom or wife) has given me way too much time to self-reflect. When you weigh over 200 lbs it seems like a huge mountain to climb to get to an ideal weight. Several times in the past I have lost weight and ended up right around the 200 lb mark (which is where I am now) and couldn't get past it - then quit. I think that is why I was so upset today. I worked and worked and lost ONE POUND!! It made me feel like "here we go again, I'll be 200ish forever"!! Part of me wants to just give up, but part of me wants to keep on pressing past this plateau. I have been really surprised by the pressure all of this public competition puts on me. I didn't think it would bother me, but on days like today, it does.
Well, David lived up to his word this morning. He really kicked my booty! My shoulders and upper arms are already starting to ache. But, I made it. After he kills me on the machines THEN he decides to put me on the step mill. I can't understand why we don't do that first when I'm not already gasping for air!! Towards the end of my workout he kept saying - OK, we're going to just burn out those muscles - I kept thinking... MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!! I did STEP last night. It wasn't too bad. I'm pretty coordinated so I didn't fall on my face or anything. The nice thing about taking classes this time of the year is that there are a lot of "new year's resolutioners" that have no idea what they are doing either (so it is not just me and a class full of pro's) LOL!
Well, I am a little drained today. I don't know if I'm just tired or if I'm drained from the excitement of the day yesterday. I was up very early for the news and then did KICK for the first time last night. I was so tired I fell asleep and forgot to make sure my child was asleep!! My husband came in from watching the LSU game around 10:30 and sure enough, he was still wide awake! It gets a little difficult for us mothers to juggle focusing on ourselves (exercise, TV, etc) and handling the house, kids, work, etc. But, the good news is that I LOVED kick. I was so surprised. I went into this competition saying "I don't want to do those classes, they are way to bouncy and hyper for me". Well... am I eating my words or what??? Kick is about as bouncy and hyper as it gets and I really really liked it!
I am really curious about tomorrow. David says he is really going to work me on the machines for the first time. He keeps asking, "are you ready for Wednesday?" I'm starting to think I might not be ready - LOL. We always plan my exercise schedule on Wednesday mornings for the week. I hope he takes it easy on me Thursday b/c it is my birthday. I have a feeling that even the "birthday girl" doesn't get a break!
Last night at DD Kelly and I were discussing our weight loss and many people keep asking me "how did you do that?" Even Tricia mentioned it on her blog - LOL. Well, all I can say is that David deserves most of the credit. He constantly questions everything I do just to be sure I'm not slipping (which is a good thing). Also, when I am in those classes and in the gym, I literally give it EVERYTHING my body can take. I said from day #1 that I was extremely competitive and I guess people are now starting to see the severity of my "problem" - ha ha!!
Weigh in UPDATE (1/7/08):
209 lbs. - 16 lbs. to-date loss - 7.11%
OMG! I am still in shock that I lost 16 lbs! I knew my clothes were fitting better and some are even starting to be too loose, but I am shocked with 16 lbs!! Kellie was teasing me this morning after weigh in, asking me if I had rocks in my pockets for the initial weigh in - ha ha! I was a nervous wreck. I would have died if I would have come in 3rd or 4th. I realize that losing any weight is a wonderful thing, but that darn competitive streak in me just won't let up! Of course, I made sure that I called David to see if he was watching. He had only seen part of it b/c the TV's are on mute at DD. I was perfectly happy to fill him in on the results! Just in case the viewers did not get out their calculators, I am in the lead with approximately 7% lost. Robert didn't have time to say all of that b/c they needed to go to a commercial break. Hopefully I can keep it up! I have definitely been "pumped up" with all of this. I have had so many people tell me congrats b/c apparently most of my co-workers are fans of 7 news Sunrise.
Saturday I did cycling class for the 3rd time. I was so excited b/c there are two songs that require you to stand up and pedal. I have never been able to finish either song. On Saturday, I completed them both!!! When the first one was over I exclaimed "YES" - everyone looked at me like I was crazy and giggled, but I didn't care. Talk about a personal victory! On the down side, I did Centergy on Thursday. If you aren't familiar with Centergy it is a combination of yoga and pilates. I feel like the biggest rolly-polly in that class. You have to twist and bend yourself into many interesting positions. I feel like I just need to chop off my stomach rolls and then I will be able to reach where I need to. I honestly thought that the instructor was going to use the phrase, "now twist yourself into a pretzel", but she never did - it came close! I got a little frustrated but I gave myself a chat. I told myself not to give up b/c this was a life long journey and eventually I will fit right in with all the skinny girls in that class.
I noticed that Kellie had recently written about her stair mill experience - I happened to be at DD that same day when she was on the machine. I wondered to myself why she had only done cardio for about 5 minutes. Well, I wonder no more!!! After being on the elliptical for 30 minutes this morning David says to me, "have you ever done the stair mill?". I had not, but in my new found confidence I ASSumed I could do it for five or ten minutes without too much struggle - HA!!!!!!!! After about 2 minutes I had come up with a few new, more fitting names for that machine (which I will not share but continue to think each time I have to squat down to pick up something off the floor). I kept trying to pick my head up long enough to find some sort of emergency shut off just in case I suddenly collapsed. I could just picture me falling on the floor and the steps continuing to smack my face one after the other. After the 5 minutes of hell on earth, David had me take my heart rate. It was 168 bpm. He says, "oh, we could have pushed you a little more!" I hate to tell him, it is not my heart he needs to worry about, it is my quivering legs (which is my main concern when traveling up endless stairs)!!!! The SICK thing about it is that I now have this "must conquer stair mill" attitude. What is wrong with me? A month ago I would have just made a mental note to avoid it like the plague from now on. The fun part of all of this is that I have cycling tomorrow morning which should be real interesting considering I won't be able to pedal - LOL! I'm sure I'll have plenty more to say after our first weigh in on Monday!
Well I am back at school today which is definately a change. I have been spoiled the last two weeks because I was able to workout whenever I wanted... not anymore. I was at DD today at 5:15 AM. This would be no big deal except I have to go back home and get my 4 yr old son ready for school and myself ready for school in about 35 minutes. I guess I'll get used to the rush in the mornings. Workouts are going well and so is the diet. I am excited to FINALLY get to weigh in on Monday b/c we haven't been on the same scale since December 17th. I know approximately how much I've lost, but I want to know for sure - especially since everyone in the world keeps asking me how much I've lost. I'm feeling pretty good right now b/c I came to a realization - I was in better shape than I thought. I know that sounds strange, so let me explain. Yes, I was in BAD shape compared to the shape I should be in. I kept saying "I feel trapped in this body". I used to run before joining this competition. I did not do it enough and I definitely did not eat right so there were little results. Because of that "underlying fitness training" I feel that I have been able to keep up better than I thought initially. I have been a little sore off an on, but it has not been unbearable at all. After just a few classes I am starting to be able to keep up and increase my weights, etc. So, the bottom line is that I think I was really "trapped" in my big body, it just took a little extra to push me out of it! LOL!
David (trainer) seemed a little frustrated with me yesterday. He doesn't think I sweat enough - LOL. I seem to have a very fast recovery time so it confuses him. I guess "big girls" like me usually sweat a lot?? I have never been a big sweater - unless I am running outside in 100 degree heat. When I am inside the nice cool gym, I just don't. David is another reason I will be happy to weigh in. The scale at DD Moss Bluff is not too accurate. He put me on it yesterday twice. The first weigh in said 5 lbs different than the second. Everybody there knows it also weights "heavy" by at least 4 lbs over. I should have hopped on my scale at home RIGHT after that first weigh in so I would know how close they are - but I didn't! Everyone keep your fingers crossed on Monday!
Well, I have survived week 1 of the workouts. I've had to "try out" all of the different group classes that Dynamic has to offer. So far I have suffered through cyntergy, power, and cycling. Cycling was the most difficult class I have ever been through. I thought my legs were going to fall off! The good thing is that I WANT to keep doing it to prove to myself that I can complete the class without stopping periodically. I am starting to feel like I have more energy each day. My diet is going pretty well also. Today is Christmas Eve so I guess I'll see what kind of will power I have today and tomorrow. My trainer told me I can have a small "cheat day" each week, so I am thinking that will be tomorrow. I am pleasantly surprised that I am not too terribly sore. I thought by this point in the week I wouldn't be able to even move. We found out that we are going to be weighing in on Mondays in January on the Sunrise show. That is a little strange for me because I am used to being in front of kids everyday but definitely not used to being in front of the entire SWLA area! I really want to do a good job with my diet over the holidays. I REFUSE to waste all of this exercise by over eating the next couple of weeks.
Last night after our first meeting the reality of this competition set in. I'm getting a little nervous now, which I didn't expect. I keep thinking about all of the people that are now involved in this adventure. All those people that voted for me are really excited and are going to be watching me - yikes!! I don't want to let anyone down. I know deep down my friends and family will be proud if I try my best, but I still feel like I need to WIN to be truly successful. I guess that is my competitive spirit coming out! I am dying to get started with my trainer. I have a million questions for him. I know this is crazy, but I hope he is MEAN! I need someone as hard-headed as me to whip my booty into shape.
Heather Mallett 225 lbs
Waist: 47 1/2